


In Silence (I'll love only you)

by segnoritaoso



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, F/F, Pre-Series, more than what i had planned
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-24
Updated: 2017-07-06
Packaged: 2018-11-18 15:00:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 15,513
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11293074
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/segnoritaoso/pseuds/segnoritaoso
Summary: Lena met Kara in college.But that was before everything went to hell.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Arolac](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Arolac/gifts).



> I blame arolac for everything.

In her defense, Lena would like to say that she was up all night working on her dissertation. Or maybe her crazy ex-girlfriend had destroyed her alarm clock (again). Anything, really. But in fact, none of that is truth. The only reason she was late to her meeting with this professor (who had graciously agreed to help her) was that she got distracted by a pretty girl.

She even got up early. Had more than enough time to go to that coffee shop halfway between her apartment and campus. Bought her coffee and sat down to drink it. Because she had Enough Time. Up until then, everything was going great, except for the wall she had hit regarding her thesis (which was the whole reason she needed to talk to Professor Danvers in the first place, but). That’s when she walks in.

And is not that she has a type, but blonde hair and pretty (sexy) smiles just about do it for her. So when, bless God, this girl asks if she can sit with her (the rest of the coffee shop being full), Lena just smiles and says, “of course.” Pretty girl’s name is Kara. And she’s made of sweetness and smiles. Exhibit A: the amount of creamer and sugar in her coffee. Exhibit B: the two doughnuts she’s having with said coffee.

But is not like she can just say to Professor Danvers, “sorry I’m late, I got distracted by a pretty girl who I met at a coffee shop, and spent half an hour just talking. And she’s the sweetest human being I’ve ever met.”

Kara is working on being transferred to National City University from Metropolis’s University. And along with that, she’s turning her minor into a major and vice versa. “Turns out, I like science more than I like journalism.” Which, Lena is... she doesn't know what she is right now. And maybe she can’t stop staring at the girl. So when she checks her watch is only to realize is 9 am. Aka, the time she was supposed to meet with Professor Danvers.

“Shit.”

This is enough to startle Kara. She’s frowning. “Something wrong?” she asks.

“No- I mean, yes.” Lena curses inwardly. “I have to go. This was lovely.”

And she bolts for the door, leaving Kara behind. _Frowning_.

That’s enough to make her feel guilty. For crying out loud, she doesn’t even know Kara’s last name and she feels guilty. Not even Winn can make her feel guilty for skipping his ridiculous comic cons and they’ve been best friends for three years. Ten minutes later, she’s outside a door with a wooden plate that reads “A. Danvers, PhD”. Stilling herself with a deep breath, Lena knocks.

“Come in,” says a voice from the inside.

“Hello, my name is-“ Lena stops short.

Professor Danvers has company.

“Hello,” she says again “I know you.”

The girl from the coffee shop is sitting in front of the desk. _Kara_ is having a _closed door_ meeting with Professor Danvers. Who currently is looking at her with a perfectly raised brow and crossed arms. Lena just interrupted a private meeting between Kara and Professor Danvers. Shit. And now Lena is staring at Kara. Double shit.

“Lena!” Kara says, with the same bright smile she was wearing while talking about the list of pros and cons she made before deciding to change coasts. Lena doesn't remember a _girlfriend_ being part of the pros.

“Alex, this is Lena.”

_Alex?_

Kara is also shooting _Alex_ a meaningful look while she says this. But the meaning of said look escapes Lena entirely. So she clears her throat and tries to appear less taken by surprise than she is. Successful, she is not.

“I’m sorry, let me begin again,” Lena extends her hand to greet the professor. “My name is Lena Luthor. I emailed you with a question?" Professor Danvers is now smirking, so Lena specifies, "about nanobots?”

“Yes, of course.” Professor Danvers says. “Kara, we’ll continue our talk later.”

Kara starts nodding, “yeah, right.” She closes in on Danvers and _kisses her on the cheek_. “See you later.” Kara then turns to Lena and blushes. “Bye, Lena.”

Kara disappears behind the door, in between blushes and smiles and Lena wishes, not for the first time since she left her at the coffee shop just a few minutes ago, that she had asked Kara for her number. Not that it would’ve been a good idea, considering Professor Danvers right here, but still.

Lena turns back to Danvers. Enough of her concentration has been lost on Kara for today. Time to get to work and kick that PhD’s ass. Lena takes a couple of folders from her carry on and starts talking. “So I read that paper you wrote on nanobots and I was wondering…”

Turns out, Professor Danvers knows just how to fix Lena’s problem. And the answer comes to her with just 25 minutes of conversation and a desk full of spread out sheets and blueprints. Lena is impressed. Again.Danvers offers her assistance whenever she needs it, Monday to Friday between nine and ten thirty am.

Just as Lena is about to leave, Professor Danvers stops her. “How do you know Kara?”

And well, normally Lena would question a professor asking her any kind of personal question. But given the amount of staring that took place as soon as Lena entered the office, she can’t argue that it isn’t justified. Especially if there really _is_ something going on between Kara and said professor. Just her luck.

“I met her earlier, at a coffee shop.”

“So you were drinking coffee, talking with a stranger, and that’s why you were ten minutes late.”

Like, is there really a reason for calling her out for being a useless lesbian?

“That appears to be the case.” Lena answers, forcing her face to remain impassive.

Danvers just hums before saying “let me know how your dissertation comes along.”

Which is a dismissal if Lena has ever heard one. “I will. Thanks again.” And Lena leaves as fast as her feet can carry her, closing the door to a smirking Alex Danvers.

It seemed like a good idea combined with a nice bit of luck. To be stuck on a problem, and then find out one of the professors of the faculty had not only done research but also been published on the subject. It was just too good of an opportunity to pass. So Lena had emailed the professor and had then received a prompt answer just a couple of hours later. Lena has to admit Professor Danvers was brilliant, the past 25 minutes only confirming what Lena had assumed when she read the paper that started this.

And Kara. What was Kara doing in Danvers’s office? Was is just Lena’s overactive imagination or was something going on there? Because those two seemed really close. And, come to think of it, how did she get there before Lena? Traffic was hell at this hour, which is why Lena walked from the coffee shop to campus. That’s a problem for another day. Not now when she has her answer and can continue with her thesis.

Lena texts Jack to meet her at their lab asap. She has the answer she needed. She’s going to blow everyone’s mind, including her mother. Especially her mother. Mind made up, she pushes the door open- only to find Kara sitting on the steps.

“I’m not stalking you,” is the first thing out of her mouth. Her smile is not quite as radiant as the one at the coffee shop. Her hands are buried in the pockets of her coat.

“I didn’t think you were.” Lena can feel her eyebrow raising and a smirk forming. “Walk with me? I need to get to the lab.” Kara just follows her without saying a word and after a few minutes Lena interrupts the silence. “I’m sorry for leaving so abruptly. I had a meeting to get to, as you probably realized.”

“That’s okay.” Kara says, her full smile returning. “So, what are you working on?”

“My thesis. I’m trying to create robots that are able to play doctor.” Kara blushes at Lena’s wink. It’s one of the times Lena is glad she can flirt without trying, new goal: make Kara blush as often as possible. Only… “So, Kara.” Lena extends Kara’s name playfully. “What brought you to Professor Danvers’s office?”

Kara laughs. Which is a step up from blushing in levels of adorable-ness and it makes something jump in Lena’s gut. “What’s so funny?”

“You calling my sister “Professor Danvers” is very funny.”

Sister? _Sister_!

“Your sister?” Lena scans Kara’s face and can’t for the life of her find any resemblance what-so-ever. Maybe if Lena could remove Kara’s glasses… But then that mental picture turns into one where Lena is removing those glasses to better kiss Kara which, not very productive.

“Well, adoptive sister but same difference.” Kara shrugs. “The point is, it’s going to take me a while to get used to people calling my sister “ _Professor_.” I’m glad that there’s no reason for me to take any of her classes. That’d be weird.”

Lena pictures sitting in a lecture given by Lex and can’t stop the chuckle that escapes her. But given that the only thing Lex know about robotics is their application to weapons, she doesn’t think she’d be very interested in taking that hypothetical class. But then again, Lex is currently in a campaign to convince the world that aliens are bad, which only sounds demented, a bit jealous and a lot xenophobic if you ask her.

She pushes the thought away.

“Yeah, I get why it would be weird.”

Kara is still smiling that full smile and the Engineering building is getting closer and closer. And now the potential girlfriend is her sister. Besides, Lena knows if she doesn’t she won’t be able to concentrate and she’s so close to the finish line. Lena takes a deep breath and braces for failure.

“Can I have your number?” She gives Kara her most winning smile. “Maybe we could share a cup of coffee again sometime?”

“Sure, I’d like that.” Kara takes the offered phone and texts herself. “And now I have you too.”

After they part ways, Lena checks her phone to find a new thread of text in it, under the name Kara :). Funny thing is, if she had been the one to save the number on her phone, Lena would’ve also added a smiley to Kara’s name. Sweetness and smiles indeed.

* * *

 

 **[Kara :) 22:04]** _hey lena, r u gona go to noonan’s tomorrow for breakfast?_

 **[Lena 22:07]** _noonan’s?_

 **[Kara :) 22:08]** _the coffee shop where we met!_

Lena has been going to Noonan’s at least twice a week for the past two years. She knows what Noonan’s is. There are two more Noonan’s in National City and she heard talk of them expanding to Opal City. And she might have, maybe, made an investment for said expansion, with her own money. The money she earns for TA’ing and grading tests for the undergrads. Is not like she has to pay for the apartment she lives in.

But, back to the point. She knows Noonan’s and she likes Kara. So why is she playing dumb?

“Lena, stop staring at your phone and finish this calculation so we can try again,” says Jack. Jack, who is a friend and a fuck buddy. Jack, who she doesn’t feel like she can talk to about Kara. Who told her it was a good idea to have sex with one of her only two friends? She knew this would happen. Plus, these are her bots, why is he pushing her?

“Lena!” She is startled by his yell, having zoned out again.

“You finish the calculation if you’re in such a hurry.”

“Well, someone is grumpy.” Jack comes closer. “Wanna talk about it?” He presses himself against her side, goes to kiss her neck. Lena takes two steps away.

Again, having sex with your friend/lab partner? Bad idea, or at least not a very productive one.

“Something wrong?” he’s now a confused and wounded puppy. She no longer keeps a list of evidence of why it was a bad idea to sleep with him.

“Nothing’s wrong. I finished.” She hands Jack the sheet with the last result. The stupid bots they are testing shouldn’t fry themselves again this time. She enters the new numbers into the program and waits.

 **[Lee 22:19]** _it could’ve been a different one._

 **[Kara :) 22:22]** _are there more of those?_

 **[Lee 22:24]** _a few._

“Lena! C’mon!”

Right. The bots. She looks up to see that none of the bots are melting, on fire or up in smoke. And the program Winn made for her to monitor the bots shows that everything is in order. uh. “Look at them.” Jack is smiling.

Actually they both are smiling but Jack is tearing up. He sounds like a proud papa. Lena makes a mental note to congratulate Winn for his program, not that she wouldn’t have been able to write the very same problem, but it would’ve taken time she wasn’t willing to spare.

It’s still odd that the bots finally decided to work. Lena is big enough to recognize she wasn’t paying attention to the math when she was solving the problem, she was thinking of Kara.

 _She was thinking of Kara_. And everything went _perfect_. Lena doesn’t believe in luck but she’s just about to call Kara to the lab so she can finish her thesis early. Wouldn’t that be neat? Graduating High School at 16, finishing college at 19, passing directly to the PhD program, and then being done with said PhD at 23?

If only she can get her nanobots to do what they’re supposed to.

Though, according to the professor in charge of her, she only really needs to make advancements on the field in order to get her last diploma. Lena smirks. Go big or go home.

Well, this means she’s done for the day. And apparently Jack has the same thought. “Do you want to talk about it now?” He has a tablet on hand, writing down the progress of the day, and Lena’s calculations.

“Maybe later.” She grabs her bag and sticks Danvers’s notes inside. “I’m leaving. Don’t stay up too late.”

She gives him a quick hug and leaves. The hugging took some time getting used to. The only other person she was used to hugging was her brother. But now he’s unreachable. Lex used to make time for her, now she can’t remember the last time they spoke. Nothing has been the same since that guy in the blue suit appeared in Metropolis, but things have spiraled out of control in the past year, and Lena has not heard from her brother in a while.

 **[Kara :) 22:25]** _let’s try them all!_

 **[Kara :) 22:26]** _unless you already have._

 **[Kara :) 22:26]** _have you?_

 **[Kara :) 22:37]** _Lena?_

 **[Kara :) 22:38]** _Sorry for flooding you with texts :(_

Lena winces when she realizes she left Kara talking by herself.

 **[Lee 22:41]** _Sorry for not answering. I had a breakthrough with my research._

 **[Lee 22:43]** _yes I’ve tried them all_

 **[Lee 22:43]** _though, I wouldn’t mind joining you in the discovery of Noonan’s_

 **[Lee 22:44]** _Let’s go for breakfast tomorrow._

 **[Kara :) 22:46]** _I googled it! I wanna go to the one near CatCo. Plaza_

 **[Lee 22:47]** _I wanted to reserve the best for last, but as the lady wishes._

Lena hopes Kara is blushing, that that little bout of goofiness pays off.

 **[Lee 22:48]** _May I pick you up?_

And is not that Lena means to brag, but she does drive a bike. A Very Nice bike. And if arriving to pick her up might get Kara to swoon a little, she’s going to take it. Kara sends her the address and Lena goes to sleep with a smile on her face.

* * *

 

They never agreed on a time to meet.

How absurd is that? Lena is an honest to God genius and she forgot about that. Also, Lena only has one helmet. So maybe she gets up extra early, buys a second helmet, all before 8:20 am. Yesterday Kara got to the coffee shop, around that time so it should be an acceptable hour to call her.

Hopefully.

“Lena” Kara answers immediately, which bodes well.

“So we never actually agreed on a time to meet.”

“Yeah,” Kara laughs, “I realized that after we had said good night.”

They kept texting well after midnight, and Kara’s thread on her phone was now longer than the one she kept with her advisor. A call might have been simpler but Lena finds it easier to get a grip around pretty girls via text.

“Well? May I go pick you up now?” Lena hears a voice in the background. “Is there someone with you?” Lena quirks her eyebrow even though Kara can’t see her “I’m not… interrupting, am I?”

“How do you make everything sound so…?” A pause, “Is just my sister. She wants to know who I am talking to.”

“Do you want me to stop making everything sound so…?” She leans on her bike, smirking.

“Just come pick me up, will you?” Kara laughs as she ends the call.

 

Turns out, Kara has her own helmet. And she is Not Wearing any other helmet. Lena has never wanted to kiss her more than she does right now. Apparently, Professor Danvers also drives a bike, which is probably why Kara has her own helmet. Lena has also not thought this trough, because for the next 25 minutes Kara is sitting behind her, hugging her. If this doesn’t spell trouble for Lena, she doesn’t know what does.

“I do own a bike,” Kara says once they are sitting beside each other at Noonan’s. The one near CatCo. Plaza. “I had to leave her in Metropolis.”

“If you want to,” Lena can’t believe she’s actually about to offer this, “I could pull a few strings and have it at your door by next Tuesday.” Luthor-Corp does have to deliver things all across the country, so it has a truck company. And is not like it would be the first time she took advantage of that little fact to get something, but it would be the first time she did it to impress a girl. Maybe she should add this to her list of bad ideas.

“Pull a few strings?” Kara is smiling with her eyes. “You sound like a mobster!”

“Wow. I’m insulted!” Lena laughs. “So that must mean you’re _the_ Lena Luthor.” Kara’s tone is playful but the conversation has lost all humor for Lena. It definitely was a bad idea. “The little sister.”

Little sister to a brother she hasn’t spoken to in months. “Don’t believe anything you’ve read about me.” Lena tries to play it off but the humor has left her, so she changes the subject. “How did it go yesterday? You had to take a bunch of tests, right?”

“A mere formality”, Kara says.

The conversation goes from there to all sorts of topics. Lena can only stare, Kara is so lovely. She is now eating sticky buns, licking her fingers, which isn’t helping Lena At All. Of maybe it is helping her, a lot. But Kara is just so cute, defending her love for sweets and pop music. And she shows that same intensity while talking about physics.

At some point, Kara’s hand landed on Lena’s. And now Kara is only using one hand to express herself, so Lena thinks is only right to turn her hand around in order to twine their fingers. Kara’s only response is to grip hers harder. Lena will be walking in clouds for the rest of the week because of this.

“And I’m so thankful for your sister,” Lena says, “I had been stuck for two days when I finally found her paper, and then she agreed to meet.”

“Good thing she’s working at NCU, then.”

“Oh, no.” Lena says, “If she weren’t, I would’ve chased her across the US. It was exactly what I needed."

"Just think about it,” Lena continues, “with only just one injection, we’d be able to detect exactly what’s wrong with anybody! No more inconclusiveness! With a little bit more of work, these same bots should be able to cure those diseases.”

“Could you show me?”

“My bots?” Lena is skeptical “I’d love to. I just fear it might bore you.”

“Well, while I do like more theoretical than applied physics, I still think it’s amazing.” There is much less traffic at this time of day than there was early in the morning, so just ten short minutes later they were back at NCU.

Kara takes her hand again while walking towards the lab.

* * *

 

It becomes routine. They meet for breakfast almost every week day. Kara goes to class and Lena goes to the lab, or to meet her advisor. Some days, Kara shows up at the lab to study and doesn’t do much studying; instead she usually plays with the nanobots or reads the papers Lena and Jack have laying around. She’s so quick to understand everything that it’s hard to believe she’s an undergrad (and in second year to boot).

Lena has emailed Alex a few times (and why wasn't Alex her advisor from the beginning?) and they think that in maybe in a few months they will be done. All in all, Lena couldn’t be in a happier place right now. That’s a lie, she’d be happier if she had the guts to kiss Kara but nothing has happened beyond flirting and hand holding.

Since last week, Winn has become intolerable. Says he will not meet Kara until Lena grows a pair and kisses her, and okay, Lena will admit that she’s been talking about Kara more and more.

“When she’s officially your girlfriend, you can invite her to come with us to comic con!”

“Please don’t say that, I’m sure she’d love it.” Lena groans with distaste. They had met on an online forum about internet privacy, and they got into a heated argument when Winn had said she’d never be able to find out where he lived. 20 minutes later, Winn’s phone had rung. “This is what happens to people when they get cocky,” was the only thing Lena said before hanging up. Lena found his address and phone number, just to mess with him.

But, water under the bridge, three years later they had become best friends and Winn had learnt never to challenge Lena. She was more competitive than anyone Winn had ever met.

Now Kara is having breakfast at Lena’s apartment, which is a recent development. In fact, is the reason Winn won’t shut up about Lena making a move. Lena just wishes she had taken Kara home last night, after an evening at the lab. She has made progress in spades and Lena can’t quite believe she’s able to concentrate when Kara is right there. She was right when she thought Kara works like a good luck charm.

“I think Jack doesn’t like me much,” Kara says out of the blue.

“That’s impossible, Kara.” Lena rolls her eyes “It’s impossible not to love you, you must know that.” Kara is blushing and Lena no longer keeps a tally of how often she makes her blush.

“Well, he doesn’t.” Lena has noticed too. It’s hard not to notice when Jack rolls his eyes whenever Kara walks through the door. But she guesses that has more to do with the fact that ever since she met Kara, Lena hasn’t wanted to have sex with him. Honestly, men. Is not Lena's fault that she only feels romantic inclinations towards women and she won't apologize for that.

“He’s just jealous you’re better at physics than him.”

Lena had originally teamed up with Jack because they shared a lab. It was productive to them both; Lena has always worked better when she has someone to bounce ideas off of. And lately it has become apparent that Kara is better suited for that than Jack. She catches on to things faster. Plus, Jack has fallen behind in his own project. He has not been doing the research needed and has just been testing random ideas to see what sticks.

Lena has long since stopped being irritated by other’s people unproductivity, so she pays him no mind. Except now he’s making Kara feel uncomfortable. “Hey, do you think your sister might want to come to the lab?”

“Why?”

“To show her what we’ve done” And so Alex intimidates Jack enough to get him to treat Kara more nicely. Given that the talk Lena had with him rendered zero results, she’s not above calling for the big guns.

“I’ll ask her.”

Kara’s alarm starts ringing.

“We have to get going.” Even though Kara doesn’t really need to go to class she still does. Lena believes is because she likes to be with people, and in the month that has passed since Kara arrived she has acquired a big group of friends. Which was no surprise, Kara is, in fact, the loveliest human being that has ever existed.

They walk back to campus and even though the days are starting to get colder (not that cold, they are in California after all) Kara’s hand is always warm in hers. Before parting ways, Kara says bye with a quick kiss to Lena’s chick. And Lena swears on everything that has ever been considered holy, she’s going to kiss that girl before the end of the week. Right now, she has a class to teach so her thoughts should really stop chasing the girl who has just left her side.

When she enters the classroom she hears it: “Did you see Luthor holding hands with some girl?” She decides she will wear a rainbow badge tomorrow.

* * *

 

Professor Danvers agrees to go to Lena’s lab.

She and Kara arrive before Jack. It couldn’t have been better if Lena planned it herself. The three of them are huddled around the latest challenge when Jack opens the door.

Lena watches as Professor Danvers watches his reaction to Kara’s presence.

“You have two of them, now?” He asks, seemingly unable to contain himself.

“Two of what?” Professor Danvers returns, impassive. “Two… you know…”

“No, I don’t.” Danvers challenges. “Tell me.”

“Two new fuck buddies.” he spits, “That’s all she ever does, and she’ll use the both of you until she gets bored.”

“Will she, now?” And if Lena was on the receiving end of that look she’d be pissing herself. As is, she only wishes for some popcorn. “Well, Jack. It’s a shame you think so lowly of yourself.” Danvers closes in on him, like a bird of prey. “These two have been dating for a month and nothing has happened. If it had, I’m sure my sister would’ve told me.”

Professor Danvers pauses, waiting for it. Lena can see it, right down to the very second, the moment when the realization hits.

“You’re Kara’s sister? You’re Professor Danvers?”

“Quite.”She says looking down at him, even though he’s taller. Everyone in the room can see the gears in his head turning looking for a way out. “I should write you down for harassment. But if you apologize to my sister, and learn to deal with the fact that she’s just smarter and prettier than you,” she pauses again, letting the words sink “We’ll leave it like this. In any case, I will be taking the security videos of the lab, for safe keeping.”

“I’m sorry, Kara” Jack says immediately, tears in his eyes. “I shouldn’t have said those things to you.”

“Good enough.” Danvers says “You can leave now.”

And he bolts.

“Alex,” Kara’s tone is reproachful “you shouldn’t have done that. I can defend myself.”

“We know” Alex says, playful. Professor Danvers is being _playful_! “But if I’m not mistaken, that’s the first time he gave voice to his displeasure, right?” Lena and Kara nod “Right, so he was insulting me too. You can have at him next time.”

After that evening, the bots are ready for testing, _animal_ testing, aka. something Kara doesn’t want to see. They are still discussing this as they leave the lab. “I mean, theoretically, they should work” Lena is saying, while Danvers nods along. “But we can’t be sure until we test them.”

“Lena, all I can say, is congratulations.” She shakes her hand. “Shoot, I forgot my jacket.”

“I’ll go get it” Offers Kara, who only wants to leave the subject.

“Lena, you better do something soon.” Professor Danvers says without letting go if Lena’s hand, gripping it harder instead. “If I have to keep listening to my little sister going on and on about you, you better be worth it.”

“I’ll do my best, sir.” a pause, “ma’am?” Lena clears her throat. “I’ll do my best, Professor Danvers.”

“That’s better.” She lets go of Lena’s hand just in time for Kara to come back with the jacket. Her raised eyebrow tells Lena that Kara knows exactly what happened.

“I’m leaving,” she kisses her sister goodbye and after one last look thrown at Lena, she leaves.

“Do you want to come with me?” Lena asks, biting her lip. “I want to celebrate. With you”

When Kara takes her hand, Lena pulls at her until they are face to face.

“May I kiss you?” Lena asks. Instead of an answer, Kara just crushes their lips together. And, good God, Lena becomes addicted. She can feel the kiss in every nerve ending. Then, something unexpected, Kara is pushing her until Lena’s back is against one of the pillars at the entrance, hands at either side of Lena’s head.

When Lena’s tongue brushes against Kara’s lips, she immediately opens her mouth, sucking on it, that’s when Lena moans. Lena drags one hand against Kara’s waist and the other one goes to her hair, just to get it tangled. And then Kara is releasing her tongue only to bite Lena’s lower lip. And Lena is done for. She turns her head to the side, just to get a little bit of room to breathe. Kara is breathing her in instead, pressing her nose against Lena’s jaw, brushing the back of one hand to her cheek.

“We should…” Lena takes a few deep breaths “We should probably get going.” Lena pauses to compose herself a bit “That is, unless you don’t-”

“Let’s go, I just- I want you.”

Lena’s apartment has never been so far.

They get through the door and directly to the bedroom, clothes being discarded as they go. When Kara loses her shirt and Lena runs a hand against her stomach- Kara has abs, and while Lena has seen Kara’s arms now she’s allowed to touch. Her arms, and her back, and, God, her abs. So Lena pauses again when they are finally inside her bedroom, Kara in nothing but bra and panties, Lena in a tank top and her underwear.

Lena pauses, to take in the view. She feels like she’s been through a month of foreplay. Lena pauses and turns on the light. She wants to see, wants to touch.

“God, you’re beautiful,” escapes her lips without conscious thought. And Kara, well, Kara extends a hand towards Lena. As soon as Lena takes her hand, Kara pulls her closer and lifts her, turns her around in her arms, and gently, oh so gently puts her on the bed before climbing on top of her and kissing her.

“I’ve spent the last month thinking of this,” Kara says against her skin, “there’s so much I want to do to you.”

Kara takes her tank top off, along with her bra, after receiving a confirming nod. And just dives in, takes one nipple in her mouth and palms the other. Lena can only gasp and bury both hands in Kara’s hair, pulling her up. As good as it feel to have Kara sucking at her boob, she wants to kiss her, wants to feel her pressed against her. After Lena unhooks Kara’s bra, she drags her nails against her back and Kara hisses.

“Too much?” Lena asks, smoothing her hands against the burn left there.

“Too good,” is her answer.

“Yeah?” Kara nods, nipping along her jaw and neck.

So Lena does it again, and this time Kara’s hips jerk against hers. Which causes Lena to groan, the pressure against her soaked sex, still with her panties on, is not enough. “Take them off” Lena begs, and Kara does, taking her own panties off too.

And then they’re finally, finally pressed against each other, no barriers between them. Their legs tangled together and, God, Kara is soaked. And Lena has never been more wet in her entire life. She tries turning them over but Kara doesn’t budge, so she plays dirty: she scratches Kara’s back at the same time she bites her jaw. And now Kara is looking up at her, confused.

Lena is sitting up straddling Kara’s thigh and when she rocks her hips, spreading her wetness on Kara, she sits up, and has Lena mentioned that Kara has abs?, and cups Lena’s sex, causing her to jerk out of the rocking rhythm she had established. With Kara looking into her eyes, Lena nods her assent. And now Kara is inside her, just one finger, her other hand pressing against Lena’s clit. “More,” Lena is practically begging. When Kara gives her another finger, Lena rewards her by scratching her back. Kara’s rhythm falters for a second, but is not enough to make her lose it.

Kara bites her neck and that does it. Lena is coming and it feels… the hand Kara had on her clit moves around her to hold her, but keeps her fingers inside, moving them softly so that Lena can ride out the last waves of her orgasm. And then Lena is laughing, with Kara’s arm around her, she feels so happy.

“Give me a second,” Lena says, brushing Kara’s hair out of her face to dot kisses on Kara’s forehead, her cheeks, her eyelids, and finally, her mouth. It’s slow and deep, brushing their tongues against one another, taking deep breaths in between, just to calm down. When Lena is able to catch her breath, she pushes on Kara’s shoulders and starts placing kisses down her throat.

Lena stops for a second in her collarbone, dragging her teeth and Kara hisses again. That’s even better than hearing Kara moan, those hisses. So Lena does it again on the other side and this time Kara buckles her hips, and that, that right there, is the reaction Lena was aiming for. Kara doesn’t like it rough against her boobs, Lena learns. So there are only gentle caresses with both hands and her mouth. And the last stop Lena wants to make before the final goal are Kara’s abs. Which she will admit is more for her own delight than Kara’s pleasure, too bad there aren’t as many nerve endings on the stomach.

But Lena is still good with her mouth and Kara has been moaning non-stop all the while. “Lena,” Kara makes her name into a prayer. “Please, just touch me.” And when has Lena ever been able to deny Kara? She takes one of Kara’s hands in her own and runs her tongue all across Kara’s slit, once, twice. The third time, she stays on Kara’s clit and sucks.

“Oh, Rao,” Kara calls.

And if Lena is smiling, who can blame her? Lena pushes with her tongue inside of Kara, using her free hand to circle her clit without actually touching it. Lena looks up at Kara, only to see her with one arm thrown over her eyes, and Lena is smirking once again. She changes gears, going back to sucking Kara’s clit and waits a bit. Then she goes inside and that’s when she feels Kara’s hand in her hair, pulling her closer, and Kara is coming.

Lena gradually slows down until she feels Kara’s spams stop. Then she begins again and Kara comes again, almost instantly. This time, Lena doesn’t stop sucking until Kara begs her to. Kara pulls her up to lie on top of her and that’s the same position they wake up in.

* * *

 

The next morning, luckily is Friday. This means she doesn’t need to get up early for class and neither does Kara. Lena climbs off the bed to go to the bathroom and when she returns Kara is laying on her stomach, the sun hitting her across her back. Curiously, there’s not a single mark left on Kara’s back. Lena sits on the bed besides Kara to run her fingers over it, then her nails. Nothing.

Kara hisses as she wakes up and Lena is flooded with some very happy memories. But still. Curious.

“Morning” Kara says with a sleepy voice. Lena decides it doesn’t matter, and pushes the thought of Kara’s unbreakable skin away, to never be dealt with. If Kara wants to tell her what’s up that’s fine, she won’t push. S

he removes her hands from Kara’s back and starts laying kisses on it instead, climbing up her spine. When she gets to her ear Lena whispers a “good morning.” Lena intends to get up and make breakfast but when Kara pulls at her, well. Breakfast can wait.

They do make it out of bed that morning. And when they turn on the news, all hell has broken lose. Superman was fighting Batman and a mystery woman showed up and stopped them. Superman is MIA and Lex is celebrating? Why is he celebrating when charges have been brought against him?

As if the world has become aware that now they both know, their phones start ringing. Kara kisses her against a wall, leaving her breathless. “I’ll call you.” is all she says before leaving. Lena’s phone starts ringing again and it’s her Mother. Lex is in prison and she must travel immediately to Metropolis so they can show him their support as a family unit.

Luthor Corp’s board is also calling. They want her to separate herself from the trial; they want her to step up as temporary CEO of Luthor Corp. Which makes no sense, she had a minor in business back in college and has never been involved in it. They say it’s the only way the company doesn’t sink, and Lena has to agree. Can’t have Luthor Corp without a Luthor at the helm. And she won’t be the one to suggest her mother for that position.

She calls Kara, to ask her to meet for lunch so Lena can say goodbye, before leaving for the other side of the country. And what are the odds that just one month after Kara arrived from Metropolis Lena has to leave for an indeterminate amount of time? Kara doesn’t pick up her calls, doesn’t answer her messages. Professor Danvers is not in her office and neither of them is at their house.

Lena leaves.

* * *

 

She tries reaching Kara for a week with no results.

In the meantime she’s being harassed by the board, her mother, and Lex’s lawyers. Next month Luthor Corp will be announcing that Lena is stepping up as (temporary) CEO and as luck would have it, she can’t go to Lex’s trial because they want her as a character witness. Why do they need a character witness when everyone knows what Lex did and why he did it, Lena doesn’t know, but she’s not complaining because this means her mother is off her back.

Two weeks in and Lena decides she will only try Kara’s cellphone once a day. Winn has been a willing and comforting ear; she just wishes she could pluck him from his position at CatCo and bring him to her, just to have someone on her side.

After a month with no answer from Kara, Lena resigns herself to the fact that Kara wants nothing to do with her, and that last kiss, the one Kara gave her _after_ she knew what Lex had done is no longer enough for her to hold on to.

She stops calling.

Lena presents the theoretical part of her research and gets her PhD. She can’t make it to the ceremony, so they mail her her diploma. Her advisor asks to have his name deleted from the official file.

Against all odd, things seem to be going well for Lex in the trial. They paint Bruce Wayne’s statements as the rants of a jealous competitor. Nobody knows who the mystery woman is and with Superman still gone, the verdict is uncertain.

The federal prosecutor goes missing and the trial has no end in sight. Lena is now the interim CEO and has no power of decision. Her only job is to make nice with the investors, so instead of being in Lex’s office, she goes to R&D and learns what her brother has been up to. Lena reassigns people and locks away Lex’s research on Kryptonian biology. Lena no longer can find the time to talk to Winn and it’s only been four months since this nightmare started. Two things happen within hours of each other.

Superman returns, the man of steel, the one everybody thought to be dead is back. Not twelve hours after that, Lex breaks out of prison. Then what was a trial that consumed all of the US news outlets becomes a man hunt that the whole world is watching. Not even the best economist can predict what will happen to the stocks the next day, and Lena is left in the middle, trying to weather a storm that should have nothing to do with her.

Ten months after he breaks out of prison, Lex is found by Superman himself. And the trial starts all over again, with a new jury, a new judge and a new prosecutor. It’s rumored that everyone is escorted by a Secret Service team. Lena has not heard from her mother since before Lex disappeared.

The day after the verdict is given, 9 long months later, Lena walks into a meeting room with the board. She threatens and intimidates all of the members, having collected enough dirt on them to take back her family’s company, even if she has no family to speak of now. Lena has also been listening in on them and knows everything that has been happening.

All of them readily agree that moving the company to National City is the best move, to put some distance between Luthor Corp and Lex Luthor. In two months, Luthor Corp’s headquarters will be moved from one coast to the other.

* * *

 

The universe, Lena thinks, must have a sense of humor. Three weeks before the move is official, something incredible happens in National City. Another Super. First the girl saves a plane, then she is suddenly all over the place. And it has been over two years, but Lena knows that girl. She knows Supergirl is made of sweetness and smiles.

She couldn’t believe her eyes, the first time she saw the pictures, but Lena would be lying if she said she hasn’t thought of that smile a few times in the 22 months that have gone by. And how pathetic is that? They knew each other for a month. One month. Why hasn’t she been able to forget about Kara?

She has gone to a few clubs that cater to people like her. People with a high profile that want to have some fun without everyone knowing what they are up to. Has had a few one night stands, and after every time, Lena can only feel regret, can’t stop remembering the way Kara was a light in her life. For one month. Luckily for her, the move was announced before Supergirl’s appearance, so there’s no speculation on that venue. She wishes she hadn’t lost contact with Winn, just so she could ask him what does he know.

Months pass. Lena moves back to National City once she’s done fixing the mess Lex made of Metropolis and if the Venture is successful, Lena will have the go-ahead to renaming the company. It’s funny how such a silly move can make a difference, but according to the guys from publicity, a different name does mean something. The Venture is successful, and in one week it will make it first public flight. Lena herself will be aboard and she will admit that she’s excited.

So of course something goes wrong and she can’t make it to the flight, but because that is not enough, now the damned ship explodes and needs saving. Supergirl and Superman team up and saved the blasted ship.

Of course they do.

As far as Lena knows, they haven’t worked together before.

* * *

 

She is not exactly surprised, when Jess says that Clark Kent and another reporter want to speak with her.

Lena _is_ surprised; however, when besides Clark Kent’s slouch is the brightest smile she has seen.

Besides Clark Kent, is the person who has refused to leave Lena’s mind for almost three years. The whole world narrows down to that smile and those eyes.

The whole world goes back to revolving around Kara Danvers.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> about how things fall back into place

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> having a final tomorrow is the best motivator to write :)  
> Also, i would like to formally apologize for the angst.

If Lena asks Kara to introduce herself, then she can be called petty and she will deal with it. Let her wallow for a few hours before she has to go back to acting like a mature human being.

Of course, the universe says no. She cannot have a few hours to wallow, since her helicopter is being shut down from the skies. And lo and behold, Supergirl _and_ Superman, getting rid of the drones and then, of course, Kara staying behind to safely land the chopper. Of course.

Because that’s Lena’s life now. Almost three years _to the date_ , three years without a single word from Kara and then twice in one day. And it’s not like Lena can pretend she doesn’t know who S _upergirl_ is, even if Kara wasn’t her almost-sort of-ex. 

Kara, or rather, _Supergirl_ disappears after taking the pilot down to the ambulance.

* * *

 

Lena doesn’t know what Kara is thinking, coming to her, asking her to cancel the ceremony. Was she actually hoping to convince her?

“Kara, my brother is serving 32 consecutive life sentences.” Lena says, without stopping the scoff that leaves her. “Of course there are going to be a lot of people trying to hurt me.”

Lena had had to upgrade her security detail, they are paid better than her assistant, and that is saying a _lot_. But, what more can she do? People are angry at _them,_ and given that Lex is in prison, her mother is nowhere to be found, they can only take that anger out on _her._

Blowing up the venture and shutting down her helicopter is a new development, though.

“Lena, please consider it.” Kara pleads, talking with a familiarity that puts Lena off and comforts her in the same measure. “It’s obvious the person behind this isn’t afraid of collateral damage. It’s not only you who could get hurt.”

_Oh._

_Of course._

Kara is worried about the _public_ , Lena should’ve known that.

“Then I guess I will have to trust Supergirl to keep National City safe.” Lena raises her chin defiantly. “I can take care of own life, and I won’t have one if I can’t make this company into something positive.”

And with that, Lena steps up to the stage. She almost manages to finish the speech when everything starts blowing up. Her security detail is nowhere to be found (they will have to be replaced) so Lena goes to find a police officer, which turns out to be a mistake.

And then, Lena is dumbstruck.

 _Professor Danvers saves her life_ and is fighting hand to hand with the man trying to kill her. Seeing Professor Danvers disarm a man is almost as surreal as realizing Kara was a superhero. _What has her life become now?_ Is not until Kara touches down that Lena reacts, picking up the gun Professor Danvers took from her would be killer.

Kara accuses Lex of sending him to kill Lena, and she’s about to say something to defend him. Lex may be a madman, but he’s still her brother, he would never-

The man agrees with Kara. Or at least he doesn’t deny it. Lena knows Lex is smart enough to be just as dangerous in and out of prison, but the thought that _Lex,_ her brother _-_

_Shit._

Lena takes the shot.

Professor Danvers takes the man into an ambulance and Supergirl flies off to put out what’s left of the fire.

Next day, she asks for Clark Kent and, as expected, he appears accompanied by Kara. And while Lena can’t believe Kara is working as a reporter after saying she liked science more than journalism, Kara is still one hell of a reporter.

“I hope this isn’t the last time we talk?”

“I hope not either.”

And well, since Lena wasn’t given the time to wallow like she wanted, maybe the universe can make it up to her sending Kara her way more often.

Her wish is granted by nightfall. Kara lands on her balcony without making a sound.

“Good evening, Miss Luthor.”

“Hello again, Supergirl.” Lena says before turning around towards the balcony. “I was hoping I’d see you today.”

That may be Supergirl’s emblem on her chest and a cape blowing in the wind, but that’s Kara’s smile, the one that appears on her face.

“You don’t have to pretend, Lena,” she says. “I know you know.”

“Good.” Lena answers with a laugh. “I really didn’t want to. Please come in.”

She opens the balcony door wider, inviting her in. Kara bows her head a little bit before stepping inside.

“Do you want something to drink?”

“Not really.” Kara is biting her lip, the way she always did when she was worried about something. “I feel like I owe you an explanation, though.”

“Yeah, you do,” Lena says with still in every word. “But I’m not ready to hear it.”

Kara looks put out, but doesn’t say anything. Her hands resting on her hips is a new gesture, one Lena is not familiar with coming from Kara. It makes her look more like her sister, which reminds her-

“I would like to know, however” she pauses, wondering if she will get an answer, “how did your sister end up in the ceremony, saving my life no less?”

Kara laughs.

 _The nerve of this woman_. Lena is about to ask her to leave, before Kara seems to take notice and abruptly makes herself stop laughing.

“I can’t give you details, but” Kara seems to be considering her words carefully, which is also new. “Apparently, she had been working with the people I’m working with, since long before I came out as Supergirl. She won't give me details about how, though.”

“Wow,” will there ever come a day when Lena is not impressed by these two? “Professor by day, secret agent by night?”

“Something like that.” she says smirking.

Kara was always so proud of her sister, and Lena misses that. Kara gets to work side by side with her sister while Lena’s brother is now sending people to kill her. It figures it would turn out this way.

Lena is dying for an explanation, but she’s not ready to hear it. If Kara has anything halfway coherent to say to her, Lena knows she’ll forgive her, and she’s not ready to do that.

And how can it be possible, to be so mad at someone, a yet care so much about them? At times like this, Lena wishes she could just stop _feeling_ so much, or that she had the ability to sort through her emotions more easily.

“How is it, running Luthor Corp?” Kara asks curiously, “is it fun?”

“L-Corp” Lena says emphatically. “Or didn’t you pay attention to my press conference?”

Talking like this with Kara, is so easy to fall into old habits and being playful around each other.

“Sorry, I was a little busy preventing your building from crumbling down.” Kara answers mockingly.

“ _Thank you_ for that” Lena says rolling her eyes.

Kara is smiling at her, her eyes are smiling too, and Lena realizes they are standing way too close to one another (when did that happen?) so she takes a couple of steps back.

“I should let you go.” The last thing Lena wants is for Kara to leave but she needs some space to figure out where her feelings lie, “feel free to stop by whenever you like, my window will be open.”

“Great! Do you still have my phone number? ”

Lena stares at Kara. “What?”

“My number? So you can call me in case you’re in trouble?” Kara looks like a confused puppy and it would be adorable if it weren’t so infuriating.

“You mean, the number you had back in college?”

“Yes?” A pause, and then, “Why are you mad?”

“Why am I mad?” Lena asks incredulously “I don’t know, Kara, why don’t you puzzle that yourself? Good night.”

With that, Lena grabs her purse and exits her own office, leaving Kara staring after her, clearly confused about what just happen. Jess tells her the car is ready as soon as she sees her and Lena has never been more grateful for her assistant. She’s going to send her on a long vacation, all expenses paid after all of this settles as a thank you.

When she exits the building the most awful déjà vu is waiting for her on the steps. Kara, this time in civilian clothing, looking just as lost as she did in the office. Lena can’t spare the energy to roll her eyes.

“Get in the car, Kara.”

She knows her driver is an excellent one, when he just asks “where to?” looking at her through the rearview mirror. And again, when he doesn’t even raise an eyebrow at her answering “My place.” As if people coming over to her place, with her, in her car, is common occurrence. Which it isn’t.

Lena doesn’t recall ever being in a car with Kara, they always went everywhere on her bike, even after Kara’s arrived from Metropolis. The silence now isn’t doing anything to help the awkwardness but Lena powers through. Ten minutes later they arrive at her building, and not one word has been spoken.

“Good night, Phillip.”

“Good night, Miss Luthor.”

Phillip doesn’t even spare a glance to Kara, and Lena is going to send him on a vacation along with Jess. Kara gets out of the car when Lena does, and follows her into the building and then the elevator. She tries to speak then but Lena silences her with a single look.

“The elevator has cameras. I don’t think you want security knowing you’re Supergirl.” Lena explains once they’re inside the apartment. “Feel free to sit.”

Kara takes the couch, so Lena sits in the armchair.

“Why are you mad?”

“Do you have any idea,” Lena feels her tone rising so she pauses to control it and begins again, “Do you have _any_ idea of how many times I tried calling you?” She lifts her finger to prevent Kara’s answer. “I’m not ready to hear your reasons, I don’t want them.”

“I’m sorry.” And well, what more can she say. Of course Kara is sorry, she’s a good person, she _would_ feel guilty for wanting to get away from the sister of the man responsible for her cousin’s disappearance. But Lena didn’t even know Superman was Kara’s cousin before she became Supergirl. She was left hurting for months, during the hardest time in her life she was left hurting and _alone_. Lena can feel her eyes welling up, so she looks up to prevent the tears from falling.

“I know you’re sorry,” she says, taking a deep breath. “I know you are. But I don’t know how to trust you now.” Lena can’t help but laugh and it’s such a broken sound but there’s no way to stop it. “And you tell me- you’re _telling me_ to call _you,_ ” it’s such a joke the laughter mixes with her tears and she chokes on it “if I’m in _trouble?_ ”

Kara looks down. When Lena asked the universe to let her see Kara again, she didn’t expect to feel like this. She has spent so long ignoring the hurt, she’s surprised by how much there’s still left.

“I’m not going to leave again without telling you first,” Kara says. And, God, Lena wishes she could believe her. “Lena, I _know_ you don’t trust me anymore. And I know it’s my fault, but please-”

“Kara,” Lena says, if only to stop the words coming out of Kara, “you broke my heart _and_ my trust. I believe you’ll be a great superhero. Hell, you already _are_.” She gestures towards the TV, as if to point out everything Kara has accomplished in the last eight months. “But don’t ask me to trust you.”

And Kara looks so hurt by those words, Lena almost takes them back, she feels the impulse to sit beside Kara, gather her into her arms and comfort her. But that’s not Lena’s job, that’s not who they are anymore.

“I’m not giving up.” Kara says, clenched jaw, shoulders back and steel in her gaze. “Being Supergirl makes me happy, happy as I haven’t been since I was with you.” she extends a hand, before seeming to reconsider and retreating, “Would you be willing to let me try at least be your friend again?”

“And if I say no?”

“I’ll step back,” Kara answers without thinking twice. “I’ll still be there if you need me but is not my intention to insist until I wear you down.” She blushes “And maybe my performance tonight, what with me following you after you left wasn’t the best example, but I want us to at least be friends because you want to, not because you can’t get rid of me.”

Lena has to smile at that. As if there could ever be a universe where she would want to get rid of Kara.

“Alright,” Lena extends a hand, the universal sign that a deal is about to be made, “let’s try starting over.”

Kara grabs her hand and squeezes. “Awesome.”

* * *

 

It hasn’t been easy, but progress has been made. Kara is ever the gentlewoman and doesn’t push for anything. They start texting. It’s adorable how nervous Kara is about meeting the president.

The day after Kara saw the plumerias in her office, Lena has started every day with fresh ones sitting at her desk before she arrives.

Kara sends her pictures of puppies and kittens and places she wants them to have lunch _when/if she’s ready_. The highlight of her week is helping Kara catch her crazy ex. Because of course Veronica Sinclair would be the one running an alien fight club. Just the thought of it makes Lena want to throw up.

But Kara, forever sweetness and smiles, brings her doughnuts in the middle of office hours as a thank you. She drives Jess crazy, with the adjustments she has to make on Lena’s schedule. They go back to setting up alarms to let them know their time is up, that the real world is calling. Lena has known since the first time she was late to a meeting with a professor that Kara makes her unable to keep track of time. So sue her, Kara stills distracts her even as she makes her more productive.

But then, as if Lena’s life wasn’t complicated enough, Lillian is back, hovering in the background. Which will never _not_ be worrisome, so for the first time since Kara offered, she calls her and asks her to come.

Supergirl lands on her balcony less than two minutes later.

“Lena, are you alright?” Kara rushes to her side and hugs her for a microsecond before stepping back _fast_. “What happened?”

“My mother has been calling me.”

“Did she threaten you?” Kara steps closer again.

“No,” Lena puts one hand on Kara’s shoulder to calm her down, “I haven’t spoken with her since before Lex went on the run. But she said she wants us to reconnect, she said she loves me.”

Kara looks confused. Of course she does.

“Kara, my mother only says that when she’s up to something, when she wants something from me.” The confusion increases. “Listen to me, Kara.” She nods very slowly in time with her words “If something odd happens, if there’s something dangerous going on, please be careful.”

“I will,” Kara still looks like she’s not sure what’s happening but then smiles, “thanks, you know. For telling me.” Something in her expression changes. “I have to go, there’s a robbery taking place.”

Kara disappears into thin air, but not before leaving the ghost of a kiss on Lena’s cheek.

When she turns on the news, is only to learn there’s a band of robbers with new weapons, weapons that are enough to knock Supergirl out of the sky. It almost seems like a self-fulfilling prophesy.

 

Kara doesn’t want to back down, but neither will she. The gala needs to take place and what better opportunity to catch these people? Kara doesn’t agree. But then again, Kara doesn’t know she has a plan to catch them. But Lena has never been one to reveal her hand and she’s not going to start now.

“If you don’t want to come, then don’t.” She says, “but this gala will happen whether you like it or not.”

“You’re leaving me no choice!” Kara storms out of the balcony but still shows herself just as the gala is starting, still does her best to hold down the robbers until Lena disarms them. (And since when does Winn work with Supergirl? Lena has never been more regretful at having lost touch with him, when she had to take charge of Luthor Corp.)

After NCPD leaves with the robbers and the cleaning crew has started working, Supergirl walks up to Lena and for a second Lena thinks she’s going to be yelled at. Instead, Kara says with the smallest voice she’s heard from her:

“You could’ve told me.” Her eyes drop to the floor. “You still don’t trust me.”

“I trusted you to keep my guests safe. You couldn’t have done that if you were worried about everything else.”

“I was still worried about you” she whispers, looking around. “And Winn, and James.” Kara looks away and then back at her. “We could’ve coordinated if you’d told me. I’m just gonna-” she points behind herself, “I have to debrief.”

And she leaves. Well. It could’ve gone better.

Winn approaches her after everything clears. “She’s trying, you know.” he shrugs. “maybe you could _let_ her try.”

Lena turns to look at him. He still looks the same and Lena smiles at him. He hesitates between a handshake and a hug and in the end does neither. “Kara had talked about a girl from college. And I didn’t realize until two seconds ago that this Kara is the same one you used to moon about.”

His smile contains the same boyish charm Lena knew back then, this time, she doesn’t stop herself from hugging him. It feels like a breath of fresh air, to have both Kara and her best friend back in her life. Lena volunteers to join him in his next comic con to make up for the missed calls that brought about the distance between them.

Later that night, Lillian does make her appearance, but doesn’t give anything away. This only confirms Lena’s suspicions that her mother was the one behind the attacks. Because, when was the last time she stopped by just to “check on her”? Please.

When she gets to her apartment, Kara is waiting for her. Lena is not ready for a third emotionally charged conversation the same night.

“Did you know that Kryptonians can survive in outer space?” Kara says instead of a greeting. “Not only that, under the light of a yellow sun, we can actually go to other planets without needing a space ship.”

“Okay… why are you telling me this?”

“I know you don’t want to hear the reasons for my silence when you needed me most,” Kara continues as if Lena hadn’t talked, “But I want you to know that is something that can happen.”

Kara takes a deep breath, pacing the distance between the kitchen counter and the couch. Lena hasn’t even taken off her coat so she does that while Kara sorts her thoughts.

“I don’t actually have an excuse for the last eight months I spent radio silent to you, besides the fact that I was scared you hated me. And not-” she says before Lena can interrupt “not because you are a Luthor so you _must_ hate aliens. I thought you’d hate me for how I left.”

Lena sits down in the armchair and Kara takes her usual place at the couch.

“Now I know you don’t hate me. It’s just that you don’t _trust_ me.” Kara’s voice breaks at the word trust, and this time there’s nothing Lena can do to stop herself from going over to Kara and pulling her towards her. “And I know it’s all my fault, but I want to keep trying, Lena” Kara says into her shoulder, her whole body shaking with sobs “I want to earn your trust again, but not without you. Not if you want me to stay away.”

She lifts her head and looks into Lena’s eyes. Her blue eyes are red rimmed and- Lena had never seen Kara cry before. She brushes Kara’s tears away with both thumbs and pulls her to press her lips against Kara’s. It’s the softest kiss Lena’s ever had and it’s more about comfort than anything else.

She pulls Kara towards her on the couch and they just stay there, holding each other until the sun rises.

* * *

 

After that night, things start going better for them.

Kara is, of course, not happy about the presence of a new hero. “Lena, the guardian covers his face. I don’t cover mine.” She’s brought her lunch and Jess doesn’t even question Kara popping in and out of her office at any time of day anymore. “He’s covered in _lead_ Lena; he’s hiding from me for some reason.”

She has been ranting about the guardian for the past ten minutes and Lena didn’t think Kara could get any more adorable but here they are. Lena debates whether she should tell her she helped Winn brainstorm ideas for the suit, but her friend is entitled to his secrets and until they grow the balls to tell Kara, Lena won’t do it for them.

The alarm blares.

“Kara…” while Lena could listen to her all day long, she does have work to do. “I hate to kick you out, but I have a meeting to get to. Thanks for lunch.”

Lena goes around her desk to hug Kara. She’s noticed Kara lets Lena initiate any form of contact, but when she hugs her back, it’s like she doesn’t want to let go.

“Don’t worry too much about guardian. He did help you with that alien parasite, so at least you know he’s willing to work with you.” Lena smooths Kara’s frown with her thumb and Kara sighs.

She doesn’t hear from Kara the rest of the afternoon and while that’s not unusual, there’s nothing in the news about Supergirl either. Lena goes to meetings and gives the finishing touches to a presentation, then she goes down to the lab, and continues the endless job of sorting through the weapons Lex was developing. It’s been _months_ and there’s no end in sight. There’s also no word from Kara and Lena tries to remind herself Kara said she wouldn’t leave without talking with her first. She calls Winn and he confirms Kara is missing but he seems distracted, and well, with everything going on with Guardian it’s no wonder.

She should really develop a new/better tracking device.

It’s late in the evening, Guardian has been framed and exonerated and there’s still no word from her. Jess left a few hours ago and Lena is still working to distract herself from Kara’s silence. Her phone buzzes.

**[Kara 9:02 pm]** _I’m okay. I need to talk to you._

**[Lena 9:02 pm]** _I’m at L Corp._

A few minutes later Kara touches down. Her face says she has bad news.

Her mother is behind Cadmus. Of course she is. Of course her mother would try to finish what her brother started.

“Kara, listen to me now,” she steps as close as possible, while still being able to look into Kara’s eyes. “My mother will probably try to recruit me.”

Kara’s eyes widen with surprise and she starts shaking her head.

“If she does, I will go with her.” Kara is stunned. “You wanted me to let you in in my plans, well here it is. I will go and try to gather as much information as I can. You’ll just have to believe that I’m on your side. I’ll always be on your side.”

“Lena, no.”

“I will do what I must.”

Kara hugs her fiercely. “I trust you,” she whispers into her ear.

“Now go.” Her arms contradict her, as they pull Kara closer. “The plan starts now.”

Kara takes two steps to the balcony and then stops. Turns around and Lena can see it in slow motion. She walks back to her, puts a hand on either side of her face and then _kisses her_. It’s reminiscent of their first kiss, in the way it takes her by surprise the fact Kara takes control. She demands entrance which Lena gives without question, she brushes her tongue against Lena’s and she can’t stop the whimper that escapes her.

It could’ve lasted minutes or hours, Lena doesn’t know. Time defies physics and just stops so that they can kiss. Kara slows them down and then her lips leave Lena’s.

It’s with a last kiss against Lena’s forehead that Kara flies away.

* * *

 

Lena starts by calling her mother early in the evening. She doesn’t get anything out of her except that she’s really up to something big, otherwise she wouldn’t have used the “I love you” card. And really, her mother should’ve realized by now that’s her biggest tell. But that gets her nowhere.

After Kara saves her life during the attack on L-Corp, it’s obvious her mother is after something in particular, something she needs to steal to get her hands on. And it’s not like it’s a short list, the things only L-Corp can manufacture.

Lena calls Alex. Kara is great at many things but acting is not one of them and she needs sneakiness for this one.

“I have a strike team waiting outside, what do you want?”

She tries not to show how deep Alex’s words cut.

“I would think after all these years, you’d remember I’m on Kara’s side, which means being on your side.” She turns around in her chair, looking out to the balcony. “My mother is after something, and I think you know what it is. Tell me so I can do something about it.”

Alex stares at her and Lena tries to keep her face open. This is worse than the time she threatened her way back when.

“Isotope 454.”

“Follow me.”

Lena leads her throw the halls of L-Corp, down to the Labs which only open by her biometrical print. “Your goons can stay outside.” She hands Alex the isotope, only saying “do try to be careful with this. I expect this back after all of this is done.”

“Am I supposed to believe you’re just handing this to me?”

“Oh, no. You owe me.” Lena laughs. “And before the night is done, you’ll owe me even more.” And if Lena purposefully makes it sound ominous, she doesn’t even feel guilty about it.

The strike team leaves without a trace, and Lena gets to work to create something useless that looks like the isotope, something that will bond with the virus but making it inert instead of spreading it.

She calls her mother and goes along with it. Kara plays her part, until the very end trying to appeal to her better angels, but that’s what really sells the lie to her mother. After the cyborg is defeated and the Martian is still alive, after Lillian can’t comprehend what happened, that’s when Lena decides to gloat, that’s when her mother realizes what Lena did.

“You,” she says with more contempt than Lena has ever heard before, “you switched out the isotope. You made the virus inert.”

“I did,” as if on cue, the sirens start calling, “and I called the police.”

After Lillian is escorted by them and Henshaw disappears, Kara runs over to her, hugging her as she berates her.

“Why didn’t you tell me!”

“You’re a terrible actress, plus I did tell you I was on your side.”

Kara looks at her with stars in her eyes, and the last few hours are suddenly worth it. J’onn clears his throat and the moment is gone.

“I have to go. I’ll go see you as soon as I’m done with that.”

By the time Lena gets to her apartment, she can barely lift her legs she’s so tired. She puts on some relaxing music and pours herself a glass of wine. She’s going to celebrate, the drop in the stocks for what her mother did can wait for tomorrow. What’s more, she turns off her phone so the board can leave her alone for the evening.

She’s drawing a bath for herself when Kara calls for her from the balcony. She’s in such a good mood, she’s about to ask her if she wants to join when she sees her face and realizes that’s not happening. Bummer.

“I have to go, I don’t have much time.” Kara tilts her head and her eyes go a little wider. “um- My friend needs help, so I’m going to his universe. I don’t know how long I’ll be gone and I promised I wouldn’t leave again without telling you first, so here I am, telling you.”

Lena thinks speaking that fast must be one of Kara’s superpowers.

“Kara, it’s okay,” Lena says, if only to stop the flood of words, “Did you say ‘universe’?”

“Yes?”

“You’ll have to tell me all about it when you get back.” Lena hugs her without thinking twice. “Please be careful,” she whispers in Kara’s ear, swallowing hard.

“You too.”

“I promise I’ll return Kara to you safely.” It’s the first time Lena notices there’s a man out in the balcony. She nods at him and with that the two of them are gone.

* * *

 

Something unexpected happens after the news break about her mother. The stocks actually go _up_. Apparently the public thought it more worthwhile that the CEO of L-Corp stopped her own mother, than the fact that said mother was the leader of an anti-alien organization. A few investors leave but more step in to fill that space.

Jess thinks the new investors were waiting to see what side she was on, and apparently she can no longer seem neutral after putting her mother in jail. The board is now officially powerless and Lena’s life seems to finally be headed in the right direction, with her steering the wheel.

(There are, of course, still a _lot_ of people just waiting for her to fuck up, but if anything spite is one hell of a motivator.)

She goes to Comic Con with Winn, and invites him to the lab. She’s so close to try and poach him, but he tells her it’d be weird if she were his boss. Which, he might have a point. Having friends outside of work might do her some good.

The best part is that now she gets to spend more time down at the lab and it feels like coming home. The people working there seem suspicious at first but then they are delighted to show her their work. R&D was where she was supposed to work, if things had turned out the way they were supposed to, and now she gets to have a taste of that.

Javier Martinez, a young man working there, shows her a universal translator he’s working on. “It only has three languages but now that I got it to work, my friend is going to help me find more of them. So they can help me add more.”

“Do you think you could make one for me?” He’s too respectful to ask for more information, so she adds “I have a friend too; maybe she can program her language here too.”

His eyes go wide. “You don’t mean…?”

She puts her index finger on her lips, in the universal sign for “not-telling.” Now, if only Kara would just return, that would be great. It’s been a week and Alex has called her nightly to check on her. Apparently, she promised Kara she would.

Apparently, Kara went to see her before going to her sister.

Lena is still smiling, playing with the translator (which looks like an old school recorder), when she enters her office.

At the same time as Kara touches down on the balcony.

“Kara,” it leaves her as an exhalation.

“Honey, I’m home.”

Lena feels like she has been holding her breath for a week, even with the good news in the L-Corp front. Kara has been a missing piece, and Lena finally feels ready to hear what Kara has to say about her disappearance 38 months ago. Everything has settled, has fallen into place and it feels like is the only thing missing for everything to make sense.

So she laughs.

Laughs as she hasn’t since that month she spent falling in love with Kara. She must realize this too, because something in Kara’s face changes. That’s when Lena throws herself to Kara’s arms, knowing she will catch her.

She tells Kara to wait for her in her apartment, after all, L-Corp’s CEO can’t be seen leaving her office via _her balcony_ , much less in the arms of Supergirl. Then, she asks Jess to clear her afternoon and to take the rest of the day off as well. This weekend, Lena will send Jess on vacation this very weekend.

Kara is waiting on her balcony by the time she arrives at her penthouse.

“Come inside,” she tells her, going to the kitchen to prepare hot cocoa for her and an Irish coffee for herself. “Feel free to sit down.” And Kara takes one of the high chairs by the counter, so Lena takes the other one.

“How was the other universe?”

“Alien invaders. They called themselves the dominators.” Kara rolls her eyes, and it looks so odd, Supergirl sitting on a high chair in her kitchen, rolling her eyes, that Lena only now realizes Kara is still wearing her suit.

“I wouldn’t be able to take them seriously with that name.”

Kara snorts and that’s something more familiar.

“I know…” she sighs “I did miss this earth, number 38 according to Barry.”

“I want to know everything, but first…” Lena holds out a hand and when Kara takes it she intertwines their fingers she continues, “I want to know what happened. I missed you so much this past few days and I don’t want you to ever leave my life again, so I want to know why it happened, the first time.”

“Are you sure about this?”

“I’m sure.”

“You can stop me at any time.”

“Okay.”

“Okay. So…”

* * *

 

Kara answers the phone before the door closes behind her.

“Kara, finally.” She has never heard Alex sound so worried in all the years they’ve been sisters. “Come to the house immediately. We don’t have time to lose.”

Kara flies.

In seconds, she arrives and Alex is already outside waiting for her.

“We need to go to the DEO right now, Superman is almost there.”

“The what?” Alex hands her a backpack just as a black van pulls up. A man in uniform is driving. “What’s going on, Alex.”

“Agent Danvers, Miss Danvers, we will brief you on the way.”

_Agent? Agent Danvers?_

“Yes, sir.”

Alex takes her by the arms and is only years of training telling her to move when someone pushes her that gets her to comply. They get on the van, and the man drives like a maniac.

“Superman has been brought in. We need you to help him, take him to the fortress.” he says.

“Who are you? What’s happening?”

“My name is Hank Henshaw. You have been brought in by the DEO, the department of extra-normal operations. We know Superman is your cousin and we know you’re the only one who can help him. Phone, please?”

“What?”

“Your phone, Kara.” She gives Alex her phone, who throws it out the window and Kara can see how it cracks into pieces against the pavement.

“What? And since when are you _agent Danvers?_ ”

“Since before I finished college. The DEO thought it a good idea for my cover to be a college professor, given my background.”

“Stop, stop, stop. What?”

“Kara, focus. Kal is in trouble. He won’t die, but he can’t wake up. He still has traces of Kryptonite in his body and we have no way of getting it out. The only hope is for something in the fortress to help him.” Nothing of what Alex is saying makes sense, but Kara was sent to Earth to protect her cousin, and is about time she fulfills her promise.

Kara nods her understanding, which finally gets Alex to smile reassuringly.

“You’re the only one who can open that place, but since the Kryptonite in him will hurt you too, we have to put him in a lead case, to protect you.” Henshaw says. “If he had been willing to work with us, we could’ve prevented this.”

“I’m sure my cousin had his reasons.”

Henshaw parks the van. Apparently they have arrived, wherever “here” is supposed to be.

“What good are his reasons now? He might not be dead now, but for all we know he could be soon.”

Kara steps up to Henshaw, ready to throw a punch before Alex stops her. “Now is not the time.” She finds Kal with her ears and speeds over to him, while the alarms start blaring. Weapons are drawn and pointed to her. “Stand down.”

People here obey Alex. This means Alex has some authority. How did Kara not know this? About any of it?

The lead case looks an awful lot like a coffin, but Kara takes it and flies as fast as she can, ignoring everyone around her. If Alex gets mad about it, then she can yell at herself for destroying her phone.

Kalex is no help. It says there’s nothing in the fortress that can save Kal.

Except for Kal’s pod.

Very well, then.

She lands in the DEO’s main room and again weapons are pointed at her. Again, Alex orders them to stand down. “There’s nothing in the fortress that can help him. But I can get help somewhere else. I have to get him to a hospital that can treat him.”

“What are you saying, Kara?”

“I can take Kal’s pod and drive us to…”

“You better not be saying what I think you’re saying, Kara.” Alex is fuming, as expected.

“How else do you plan to remove microscopic particles of Kryptonite? Do you have anything here that can do that?” If there were, they wouldn’t have called her. “Thought so.”

She turns around to leave, but Alex stops her. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you I was an Agent. But you can’t leave this planet being mad at me.”

Kara isn’t even sure how faraway Earth is from The Hospital (otherwise she would’ve flown there herself), doesn’t know how long it’ll be before she can return. She hugs Alex. “I love you. I promise I’ll be back.”

And she leaves.

It takes 47 hours, but she makes it. Kal is strapped to the ship and most of those hours were spent figuring out how to go into hyper flight without losing her precious cargo. They are already waiting for them, having received her distress call announcing their arrival.

It was only after she took off that she remembers she promised to call Lena. Kara hasn’t felt this shitty since the last time she got Alex in trouble with her parent because she was covering for Kara. She hopes Alex reassures Lena, but knowing how protective Alex is of her, that’s not very likely.

The doctors say it will take a few weeks to get it all out, and then a few months to recover from the damage. She argues he would recover faster back on Earth, they say it would only cause more damage in the long term. They threaten her with prison if she tries anything.

Six weeks later, Kal opens his eyes. Two months after that he’s discharged, and The Hospital is under siege.

“Kara, I have to go, Earth needs me. We don’t know what happened with Lex, I can’t just leave them behind like this.”

“Go then,” Kara says, “Be Earth’s hero. I will stay to help them.” It’s the least Kara can do, after they helped Kal.

He leaves and Kara joins the defense. Turns out, some kingdoms don’t like it when Hospitals treat wounded from both sides. The star this planet orbits may not be yellow like Earth’s sun, but isn’t red like Rao either. Something in between, she’s stronger than the average, but not _as_ strong, not _as_ impervious. Still, they make it. They wouldn’t have become the best hospital in the galaxy if they weren’t prepared to deal with situations such as this.

As a thank you, they give her a ship (even after she tells them she doesn’t really need one). The ship comes with all the medical equipment they used to save Kal, all the knowledge they have on Kryptonians (the ship is more like an ambulance, at this point).

25 months since she left, almost two years of all-out war, and Kara is finally on her way back to Earth.

* * *

 

“When I came back,” Kara says, “I fully intended to lead a quiet life.” She laughs “I hadn’t even been back for a week, when…”

“The plane. It was news, all the way to Metropolis, you can imagine.”

“Alex was on that flight, I couldn’t do nothing. I had only just come back, I-” Kara swallows, “I had already lost you, I couldn’t lose Alex too.”

“You haven’t lost me, Kara.” Lena pauses, reconsiders, “well, you did, but you won me back.”

Kara squeezes her hand a little tighter.

“Did I?”

“Kara, I can’t stay mad at you if you had to go away to save your cousin,” Lena looks out the window for a moment, “I wish you’d let me know before leaving but-”

“I went to your apartment and you weren’t there!” Kara breathes in, trying to compose herself, “I guess you were already on your way to Metropolis, because when I called you, you didn’t pick up your phone.”

“And what about a voice mail?”

“I wasn’t brave enough, Lena.” Kara gets up and starts pacing again. “Your brother had almost killed Kal, you didn’t know I was an alien, I didn’t know where you stood about us to begin with. I was scared.”

“You were scared I’d leave you so you left without saying goodbye?” Lena laughs “Kara, do you realize how dumb that sounds?”

“I know now. I’m sorry.” Kara pauses in front of her, taking one of Lena’s hands in each of her own. “There’s a lot I should’ve done differently. I just hope you can forgive me-”

“I do forgive you.” Lena interrupts, “and I trust you to never do that again. But it’s going to take some time before I’m able to think about that without getting mad.”

Kara’s expression shows just how surprised she is about this development.

“I will do _whatever_ it takes to earn that, to be worthy of your trust.”

“Just keep doing what you’ve been doing,” Lena runs her fingers across Kara’s forehead in a barely-there caress, “keep showing up at my office unannounced,” without conscious thought, her fingers move to tangle in Kara’s hair, “keep trying healthy foods just because I ask you to,” Lena is now very aware of how close they’re standing, how Kara’s breathing has become shallow, how her eyes keep dropping to Lena’s lips, “and for the love of God, don’t ever disappear on me again.”

“I promise.”

 Lena smiles up at Kara, playing with her hair. “are you going to kiss me now, or…?”

And Kara blushes, the same way she did when Lena once spent a month of her life making her blush. She laughs, one of the few things that’s a step up from a blush. She’s still laughing when she brings their lips together.

When Lena feels her back being pressed against the counter, she slows them down. She tastes the gentleness of Kara’s tongue against hers, she feels the chocolate from Kara’s drink. Kara’s hands have trapped her against the counter, this seems familiar. And just like last time, Lena has to turn her head to the side, just to get a hold of herself.

“You know,” she says, “back in college I never thought you’d be such a _top_.”

Kara’s blush is one for the books. And really, how is it that someone who blushes like _that_ at the mere mention of the little fact that she’s a top can _be_ a top? That, of course, does nothing to stop the rush she feels when Kara bites her lip and lifts her, carrying her to the couch. Which, she’s in as much of a hurry as anyone in this situation but (after three years) the _couch_?

Not Happening.

She debates for a second though. Being carried around by Supergirl really is something else. So instead of getting down, taking Kara’s hand, and leading her to the bedroom, she points towards it while saying “my bedroom is that way.”

Kara sits down on the bed, so that Lena is straddling her. She lets Lena run her hands all over her torso, but- the suit is on her way and Lena has no idea how to get it off. Kara’s hands though, they are still, just grabbing her hips but not going anywhere.

And to make things worse, she’s now only kissing back, but not actually moving things forward. This is Lena’s cue to know they need to stop. “What’s wrong?” she asks looking down at Kara. Her blue eyes are crystal clear and shining, getting more watery each moment. “hey, darling, what’s going on?”

“Remember the last time- the only time we did this?”

“The one time we had sex?” Lena checks “Of course I remember.”

“We had never even kissed before that night. And maybe I feel a little bit like we rushed too much into it? And then it blew up on our faces and I don’t want that to happen again and I’m scared if we go further something’s gonna happen and-”

“Kara” Lena stops her rant, kisses her forehead. “Nothing’s gonna happen. And if it does, I’m trusting you to not disappear on me again” she kisses Kara’s cheek. “If you don’t want to, or don’t feel ready, that’s ok. We don’t have to do anything you don’t want.” she kisses the other one, “we can put on some pajamas and just go to sleep.”

Kara nods.

As Lena holds Kara that night, she thinks about how after Kara left her bed, she wasn’t able to stop. She went on a rescue mission, saved her baby cousin, and got stuck for almost two years on a war that she shouldn’t have had to be a part of. After Kara left her bed, she had to become a soldier.

And when she returned to Earth, she was scared enough, scarred enough to not be able to contact Lena. She holds her tighter when that thought crosses her mind. Kara, the one Lena thought to be made of sunshine and smiles had to fight a war that wasn’t her own, had to return to Earth only to be propelled into the role of a hero.

None of that seems fair.

Lena decides that since life has decided to give them a second chance, she will take it and not let go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> fin. se acabó.-
> 
> Thanks to my friend for holding my hand through this.

**Author's Note:**

> It's totally my friend's fault that I fell back into writing after years without putting a single word down.  
> I don't know if that's good or bad.
> 
> Now I can safely say, I'll see you in my next adventure (?)


End file.
